It would seem like the last few statements that you made sound exactly like christian churches. Would you blame Satan (if you follow him) for his teachings and that patriarchy is the problem, not satanism?
Patriarchy absolutely is the problem. Christianity is complicit in upholding patriarchy for centuries. Satanism arose within the context of a culture awash in Christian patriarchal traditions, so it comes as no surprise that it inherited some of these deleterious elements. That said, I think we’re talking about orders of magnitude in difference when large cross sections of Christianity hold to very old views about the subservience of women to men, while Satanism explicitly advocates the bodily sovereignty of the individual.
The other difference is that Satanism recognizes no real authority. Satan is not our lord, nor is the Satanic Bible or any other Satanic text regarded as infallible. We can more easily move away from outmoded ways of thinking and update our world view as social and scientific progress show us the errors in the old ways of doing things.